One of the main reasons, I am certain, that I got stuck with a severe misinterpretation of my suffering was because of my claim to be possessed by an angry spirit. It is common, according to psychiatrists, for people in psychosis to have delusions or claims that can't possibly have any credible basis in reality, such as a microchip in their brain (although Elon Musk's brain chip might one day change that!), or that said person is God, or that someone is pursuing them in some way. The problem is, if you examine some of these so-called delusions through a spiritual lens, if you consider the studies of anthropologists and what they know culturally about other societies, some "delusions" could be more real than at first glance, and if a psychiatrist does not watch themselves, their interpretation could be culturally insensitive, perhaps even racist.
Now, I'm a white girl, but I also had a spiritual past with ouija boards and weird phenomena, and as the Catholic church can attest, this stuff can go wrong. Why does that suddenly have to all go out the window once psychiatry is involved? Why must a doctor ignore the soul to be "rational" in their approach? It is my understanding (though I am not an expert on the protocol) that religion often has to play a direct part for a proper spiritual diagnosis (or validation, at least). But I don't officially belong to any church that would touch this, and in a city as boring as Toronto, how on earth could a poor woman like me find something like that? So, CAMH's answer was to just slap the wrong label on me and call themselves scientists, while I have to go about my life with a poor interpretation of what my problems have been, face mild ridicule from skeptical doctors in ER situations, and I have never been able to get away from a diagnosis that is not just flat out wrong, it spoils how I will be treated in the clinical setting for the rest of my life, or until I get a reassessment. (I am hesitant to get reassessed because I am clairvoyant, clairaudient, a channel, and have other spiritual skills, and if the wrong doctor were to hear about that, they might still want to pathologize me.) If I do get reassessed, I could lose my benefits if they decide I am not suffering from what doctors called it, even though the trauma from my issue still requires that I have a long period of recovery. There is something truly problematic about the colonialist model of sanity, and the way we treat psychological difference.
Also - if you suddenly feel you've had a realization that you are a holy being, that you are God, some might say that you have reached a stage of enlightenment where you are growing closer to the Self. But in psychiatry, if you word that the wrong way with a doctor, if you're at an ungrounded level (and that's common in an awakening), you might get slotted as bipolar, or psychotic. I have lost complete trust that CAMH knows how to hire quality thinkers who are culturally or spiritually sensitive enough to admit that the white man's model might not be the finest (certainly it's not the most interesting) way of framing transpersonal psychology. It's disheartening to know I can't put any trust in hospitals if I am feeling vulnerable... it's even worse to think that they might let me die on an ER gurney one day if they were to ignore my complaints about chest pains, or something else, and call it merely psychosomatic. Psychiatric doctors, in my experience, often don't believe a word I have to say about myself. (It doesn't help that I am a woman, of course.)
What I wouldn't give to put CAMH in its place for the trauma their invalidation has caused me. Perhaps, if my humble little life goes anywhere, that will happen one day. In the meantime, I guess to most people I'm still just a cool kook who does fun stuff with tarot cards, bibles, and crystal balls, but I won't be taken seriously.
(Sometimes I wish I lived somewhere spiritually fascinating, like New Orleans.)