Thursday, 30 April 2020

My 38th birthday...

Yesterday was my 38th birthday - it's shocking to see the decade of my 30s come so close to its end... I feel like I accomplished a lot as a soul, but apart from completing my comic series, very little in the material world.  It was a rather dry time in many ways, a lot of solitude, but after the hell that was my 20s, it's probably what I needed.  My 30th year wasn't very good by the fall, but after that things improved.  I hope my 40s are much more interesting.

The day started out yesterday with a spiritual visitation from the soul of my late father, who wasn't even aware it was my birthday - I am not sure how spirits experience time in their plane, but it was good timing, and he stayed for a couple of hours with me.  Same old Dad, complaining about the Ladytron album I was playing, but he at least enjoyed the latest Pet Shop Boys when I put that on.  My mediumistic abilities don't allow me to visually see the spirit of a person, but I can pick up on personality traits, a sense of presence, plus emotional reactions.  When my teacher friend has come by to visit, I pick up on his loveable gruffness immediately.  He remarks that I am both stranger and more interesting than he knew me to be in life, that he gets a real charge out of it.

I also received a delightful piece of fan mail about "Asylum Squad", along with a great number of birthday wishes.  I had gone to the grocery store for a small cheesecake for my online Zoom party, but the bakery was shut due to COVID-19, so I settled for a frozen cake, which didn't thaw out until today... so I will enjoy cheesecake today instead.  The Zoom party lasted almost 4 hours, and we had a good time playing online party games.  Probably one of the strangest parties I have had for my birthday, due to the circumstances, but it was still enjoyable, in the end... my bandwidth didn't crap out.

I still feel weary after my psychospiritual struggles, and am hoping it's not a sign of age - but I don't know many 38 year olds who feel like 70 year olds quite like I do.  I regularly get blood tests, and none show any physical problems, so it must be pranic and emotional pain.  I am hoping that with prayer, healing techniques and time, I will see a second wind come my way, and feel at least a little bit younger again.  I don't even have enough energy to commit to serious exercise - I do long walks and some exercise bike, but it's still a struggle.  Diet is pretty good, at least.  Being possessed takes its toll, it's a rare problem, I imagine it's all about waiting for the soul to rejuvenate again.

I have gone from being slightly stressed on and off about COVID-19 quarantine and downtime to taking delight in it.  Framing staying in as much as possible as something positive for the community, instead of perceiving it as a drag, means I don't feel strange about "wasted time".  I got some news I could be back at work as early as the summer, and my finances are balanced.  Every Sunday we have an online rosary prayer group where we dedicate our intentions to all those affected by the virus - it is sad to consider how many people have suffered from this, but important to remain confident and free of fear, at the same time.


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