Sunday, 22 December 2019
My brief out of body experience...
I was lodging in a friend's house at the time, dealing with my problems with the demon, and at one point, I was waking from what felt like a nap, only that when I sat up in bed, part of me was still lying down. I didn't turn to see my body or anything, only that I sensed that the part of me that was truly real was the part of me that was sitting up, while something that felt more like a shell was lying in the bed. I was addled mentally at the time, and I couldn't truly understand what was going on, but as I pondered it yesterday during some downtime at work, I concluded that it was the real deal - I had a legitimate out of body experience, and it was Spirit showing me that I am not my body, my body is an illusion.
I wondered, sort of, when it happened, if I was literally "scared out of my skin" from the demon, but now I think it was initiatory, so I could fear death less. I will say, it was like shedding something, or leaving something behind, and it was rather ethereal feeling. So if this is what people experience when they die, I can tell you, death is nothing - it's sitting up and realizing your body wasn't really you. It's rad and bizarre, but not terribly disturbing... it wasn't awful for me, at least.
Right now I am trying to realize more and more that my brain, my body... they do not exist - I am not my brain, I am a soul and my brain is the idea that allows me to experience this world with the mind, that's it. Too bad psychiatry hasn't caught up to what the ancients already knew, to what other sciences are suggesting. Believing you are a brain and nothing more is a bad idea for mental health, and keeps people neurotic. I am also trying to see myself as already enlightened, but barriers in the mind prevent me from being realized in my awareness to move past that right now. I guess I need to just keep praying away these barriers as I come to understand them. I know for sure I have really transformed as a mind, and with every breakthrough there is a shift in my way of perceiving and my personality, as I grow closer and closer to being the real me.
It'll be interesting to see where this goes in my life, considering I am only 37 years old right now.